The Other Day...

A few days ago, I had quite an unpleasant experience. I was at work (at a store) when a woman walked over to the lane I was standing near. She looked over at me, said something to a coworker of mine, and began laughing. My coworker said, "I don't think so". I didn't hear what the woman said, so I asked. My coworker told me, "She said you look like you skip every meal". I was in disbelief. I just couldn't believe that someone could say such a thing to a perfect stranger, and then laugh about it. It felt awful to be brought back to my middle school years and remember the teasing I had gone through about my health issues. I hadn't had a negative comment about my health or appearance directed at me in a very long time, and naturally I was in a bit of shock. I suppose the woman was able to interpret that I was uncomfortable and hurt by her comment, because she then said that she didn't mean anything by it and that she was only joking. I appreciated her effort, however, the situation wasn't made any better. I think many people don't realize that comments such as these, even if they were "joking", can be just as hurtful as calling someone a name, or worse. That is exactly what I felt like when I heard what she said, like she was calling me a name. Upon further conversation, the woman told me that she has struggled with her body image her entire life. She told me that her younger sister was always the "thin one", and that she has never had "good years" when it came to her health, in that sense. Suddenly, I realized where her comment about me came from; insecurity. This woman, in her 30's or 40's, is still dealing with the issues I faced a few years ago, at just thirteen years old. It seemed that because she was insecure of herself and was not confident, that she felt the need to point out what she believes are the flaws of someone else; perhaps to make herself feel a little bit better. (This, by the way, is one of the most prevalent reasons that bullies harm and pick on others). I reassured her that she looked great, and that comparing herself to others would not make her believe that she looks great, because it has to come from within her. She left with a smile and told me that she enjoyed conversing with me. I left content that I was able to help yet another person who is struggling with their body image. I also reminded myself that my days with low self-confidence and poor health are long behind me, and no person's comments will lead me to those negative times again! Low self-esteem, as demonstrated by this woman, can have lasting effects on someone's life. The battle between someone and their insecurities cannot be won unless we give them the tools that they need to avoid and overcome these issues. That is why I am so determined to spread the HBC message to young girls (and boys); it is important to confront the issue before it manifests!